I wanna be “that girl”

Without cares, hair blowing in the wind as she is driven around by her flavor of the month’s convertible. Attending beach parties dressed in bikinis. The girl with the constant sparkle in her eyes, lips always full and moist. The one whom all the guys flock to. The girl who gets guys to do things for her.

It wouldn’t be that hard, really. I already have a pretty good body (imho!). It wouldn’t take much, at this point, to lose the rest of the fat that i have on my belly and then I’d have a bikini-ready body. What would take more time, I think, is to get rid of the mate-finding attitude I have.

About 99.99% of the population, I would not want to marry. So I can’t get it out of my head that I shouldn’t waste my time and thiers “having fun” with them. I feel like it would make me too fake- for I’d have to laugh at their jokes even when they’re really not funny, support them in whatever they do regardless of if it’s constructive or not, put up with their endless hours talking about their cars or whatever.

But maybe that’s the right way to be. Maybe I should be “that girl”. The one that emanates beauty, receptiveness, and charm. Maybe I’m missing out on something after all?


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